Reacting versus responding

Our reaction is instant and purely emotion driven. It’s our unconscious mind made up by our beliefs, biases, and preconceived notions. We don’t take into consideration any other factors; we don’t weigh up options. We just immediately react to the situation.
A lot of the time, we don’t even KNOW our unconscious mind as it’s made from all the tiny little unnoticed things we have absorbed starting from when we were just little children ourselves.

A response comes more slowly and its 100% intentional. It’s based on information from both the conscious and unconscious mind. We’ll weigh up all information and take into consideration the well-being of not only ourselves, but those around us. We will evaluate the future impacts from our “response” and this will truly align with our deeper core values.

So, if you’re a client of mine, You’ll often hear me say to “pause before you RESPOND” and this is exactly what I mean. All I’m saying is, be intentional, evaluate the situation and allow yourself to PLAN your response.

This is such a powerful tool in parenting – And it’s not just a good thing for responding to sleep stuff. If you can be intentional with most of your “responses” as a parent – You’ll be living in close alignment with your core values as a mother.

That being said, REACTING is still in fact NORMAL. And we aren’t going to get it right every time. We are human after all.